Captain Hook’s regularly visits three Sanctuary Preservation Areas (SPA’s): Sombrero Reef, Coffin’s Patch and Looe Key Reef. They are a part of the Florida Keys Marine Sanctuary, the third largest living coral barrier reef system in the world. These are biologically important areas that help sustain critical marine habitats and species. These locations offer beautiful coral reef formations and a diversity of fish.


I unzipped my tent, which looked like the ones I’d seen a few weeks before when watching Fyre: The Greatest Party That Never Happened. Inside, the otherwise unremarkable heat became overwhelming. T.I. had largely emptied, but because the dome functions like a gigantic echo chamber it felt like I was camping inside a soccer stadium with a game going. Condensation pitter-pattered down on one corner of my tent from hundreds of feet above. Before I finally passed out, I heard the anguished cry of a single flamingo.

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Canadian customers will be responsible for all transportation, storage, and insurance costs (the ‘Shipping and Handling Fees’) and will purchase the goods from Abercrombie & Fitch Ex Works (‘EXW’) or Free on Board ‘FOB’ New Albany, Ohio ‘ i.e., ownership and the risk of loss or damage to the goods will pass to Canadian customers when Abercrombie & Fitch makes available or delivers the goods to the carrier.

1,200,000 people visited last year. 40% of them stayed overnight with an average stay of 2 nights. Day ticket prices start at €33; an overnight stay in a tent starts at €150. There are supposedly 10 flamingos in residence, but I only saw 9 during my stay. I emailed T.I. reps to see if there’d been a death. A representative assured me they only had a double digit count and said, “[N]ow and then one of them tiptoes around to explore the rest of the hall.” There are 275,000 balls in the children’s ball pit and I’m sad to report that I missed something called the Space Hole at the water playground where “guests slip into a funnel that slowly sucks them down.” The hall has 50,000 plants from 600 species and the work of 1 self-described “palace-slut” who moved to Bali from Australia in the seventies, renounced his name (Michael White), and went on to become a world-renowned tropical landscape architect, designing both David Bowie’s estate in Mustique and Tropical Islands’ lagoon before his death in 2016. I lasted about 22 hours.
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